Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Things I Suddenly Realized All Of A Sudden All Over Again

  • That Star Trek show was alright but what was with that Spock guy always flashing gang signs?
  • Our banking system is based not on sound principles but on mutually assured destruction.
  • Hollywood Rule Number 17: Every man with an English accent will eventually play a butler.
  • Shouldn't the oath of office come with a laugh track?
  • If Nixon had been a Democrat he wouldn't have had to worry about Woodward and Bernstein.
  • Why do so many people morn the loss of the Brooklyn Dodgers when no one gives a crap that the Giants left for San Francisco the same year?
  • When I see an American flag in front of a business I just assume it's not run by a Democrat.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Like Anyone Would Care, It's Random Lyrics

They seemed like innocent words
Maybe I heard them wrong
I never knew what they were
I was singing a different song

This could be just what we need right now
Tell me how it feels to be
The living end of your time

The stupid things that they say
 'Bout what he's supposed to be
This kid believes what he reads
And he's taking 'em seriously

This could be just what we're looking for
Tell me more about how you became
The living end of your time

And when you look into the bathroom mirror
Can you see an entire generation
Crying through those eyes?

A certain kind of despair
Pompous and terrified
This fish jumped out of the bowl
Flopped around for a while and died

This could mean anything we want it to
I wish I knew just how I might become
The living end of my time

It May Be Time To Stop Asking Questions And Just Accept What The Evidence Is Telling Us

Shot: Kurds offered to help stop ISIS months ago — but didn’t hear back from the White House


Chaser: "I'm like, oh, my God. I felt awful that I'm holding up a Joint Chiefs of Staff meeting because he wanted to talk sports (laughter)."