Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Burgers From Hell

Powered by insomnia, I had a dream that I started a restaurant called Burgers From Hell. I know what you're saying... awesome! Plus, I'm a great cook and I had so many great ideas too. The burgers would be cooked over real brimstone, giving it that authentic roasting-in-hell flavor, and everything would cost $6.66. Everything on the menu was "damned" too. You'd say, "I would like a damned number 2, please", and the waitress would bring out a "damned" burger and "damned" fries with a Coke. That's how you would order them. The "damned" desserts were especially sinful. But that's when things went awry. First off, cooking over brimstone gave the burgers an unappetizing sulfury taste and smell which made everyone sick. Not good. And, since it is "Burgers From Hell", all the drinks were served boiling hot, which, of course, made all the kids cry. The final straw was the strike. With no one to serve the horrible food, I had to close down the place. Damned waitresses.

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