- Michelle had an ass flat so Obama was calling around all week trying to find a new one in the same make and model.
- He still hasn't gotten over the Bears loss in the playoffs. He just sits in the dark listening to the Superbowl Shuffle over and over.
- He was partying with Charlie Sheen (and therefore...)
- He's back on the Cocaine Train.
- He was partying with new mayor of Chicago Rahm Emanuel (and therefore...)
- He was in jail and had to be bailed out after being arrested at Man's Country for causing "an incident".
- Biden gave him directions to the White House kitchen and he's been lost this whole time.
- He's been held spellbound for weeks by Natalie Portman's nuanced yet powerful portrayal of The Black Swan.
- He was listening to the really long version of Desperado, and no one interupts him when he's listening to Desperado.
- He couldn't find anything to wear for the press conference. You know how it is. Am I right, ladies?
- He tried to sneak a cigarette and accidently locked himself in a closet.
- He was looking for his birth certificate.
- He was trying to think of more people to offend so he could have another beer summit. Seriously, that was some tasty beer.
- He thought if he spoke out, people would think he was an incompetent sham president who only got elected because....oh wait...
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
This Just Isn't Funny Anymore
Obama's lack of a response regarding the situation in Libya was because he had a scheduling issue. No, I'm serious, that is his excuse. Not whatever the hell Allahpundit's been saying this past week, but a scheduling issue. It may be time to talk impeachment. I'm so...confused...but... with a touch of blinding rage... followed by inconsolable shame. I'm so annoyed right now, I can't even think up anything funny to say, like reasons that Obama was too busy to respond to an international crisis. Such as...